Who attends writers’ conferences?

I’ve never been to a writers’ conference. Yeah I know…stop rolling those eyes and sucking those teeth of yours, it’s definitely on my bucket list, I just have to get transportation and go from there. I did come across this hilarious article written by James Duncan called The 8 Types of People Who Attend Writers’ Conferences. I couldn’t help but share the types here and of course add my two-cents into the mix. FYI, his words are the ones in italics. I want to give him 100% of the credit obviously and did not want any mishaps.

1. The Columbo. These are the question askers of writing. They will pop up in every lecture and Q&A session and often with something good to ask but they sometimes get repetitive.

I absolutely hated these people in school or during workshops at work. They mean well they really do but they just annoyed me. They have to take a breath at some point so when they do take advantage of the opportunity.

2. The Mynah Bird. A person who talks to themselves, verbally agreeing under their breath with everything a speaker is saying…making sounds of awe – an “awe” or “ahhh” or “really?”

Confession. I do this all the time I don’t know when I started to do that either. I would think people at conferences would mind. I mean you’re most likely in a room full of people talking, you can barely hear over it all so saying ahh every once in awhile is not that bad is it?

3. The Bobblehead. Close cousin to the mynah bird. One who nods at everything a person says.

It’s like a tick we can’t get rid of. And once again I’m kind of guilty of this too. So next time at a writers conference how about as you’re talking to a bobblehead throw an off the wall comment in the mix and see if they are really paying attention!

4. The Scribbler. The attendee who takes copious notes on EVERYTHING. Be friends with these people and find a copy machine STAT!

There is nothing more to say!

5. The Ghost of Christmas Future. You might miss this type if you’re not looking. They move from one panel to the next, skulking in the back rows and disappearing before the speaker is finished. They know what they want to learn, seek it out and move on to the next goal on their GOTTA DO list with little chattiness.

I don’t see too much wrong with these people…well maybe a little. A writer is brand, business. One of the points of these conferences is to network with editors, other writers, etc. So just getting some notes and cutting out defeats the purpose of the trip. Some of these events are expensive as hell.

6. The Ghost of Christmas Present. This type LOVES conferences! They love the people, the food, the swag, the topics, the city, the nightlife even the little plastic swords in the finger foods!

Ok so here is my solution for these types of people – run! I mean it, run! Like an always negative person, these people drain the energy out a room and you can only take so much of them.

7. The Collector. These types live for the free goodies vendors give out. Pins, pens, tote bags, notepads, bookmarks and vouchers for free ebook downloads.

My advice to you is follow the hell oit of these people, at a good enough distance you don’t want stalking charges added on to you. Who doesn’t love free ish?!

8. The Insurance Salesman. This type loves to talk about his/her book as do you so you’ll get along great…if you can get a word in edgewise.

These people remind me of the Jehovah’s Witnesses that come knocking on your door that has you on your hands and knees in the living because if you stood up they would use their x-ray vision through the door. They need to think you are not at home even if they hear the baby screaming in the back. Yeah I went there! A positive to these people is that they are hungry to get published and writing, you can easiky feed off of them so get their name and contact info before the end of the event.

Everyone has a little type of the 8 types above. Now that you know the core types you can be more prepared on who to network with and who to ignore. Good luck!

Peace and luv!

Posted from none other than your favorite writer’s favorite writer Ms Talia


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